THE INTERNET WILL BE OUR DOWNFALL
A STORY OF BATLES FOUGHT, TIME WASTED, AND A SWASTIKA TURNED INTO SMILEY FACE
This story begins two days ago.
Tuesday was day just like any other, it was raining outside and I was busy looking for a job on 4chan. Then I started to feel it, the crackling of the internet seething with possibility and pent-up teenage aggression. Something was approaching.
In between "Help Wanted" posts I begin to see chatter about something called drawball, or better yet, two.drawball.com (one.drawball.com has been deemed "lame"). Other anonymous internet dwellers were discussing the logistics of mounting a massive meta-transformation of the communal drawing space circle, http://two.drawball.com/, and with their sheer numbers digitally-paint this into the shapes and colors of the Natzi flag.
I was not going to waste my time trying to engender the rage of the more civilized internet denizens, those painting penises and playing tic-tac-toe, by throwin up the swaz but I did care enough to check drawball after about three hours. The anonymous troll artist community had succeeded in creating the most childish and pointless use of a swastika to offend people that the internet probably saw that whole day. It took so many people, "%9000" paint points per person, and a short amount of time to complete this goal. Victory, however, was short-lived.
The troll masses came to a critical juncture. Their objective complete, and their pubescent attention spans pushed to their limits - something had to give. After a full day of the swastika remaining supreme, the "Finfags" broke rank. The proud Finish warriors began to feverishly change the ol' bent cross of Hitler into the blue cross of their nation's flag.
The other non-Finish troll army shock troops felt uncomfortable with this step towards a symbol of real nationalistic pride and the step back from the ironic ridiculousness they hold so dear. After closing ranks and discussions lasting into the minutes, they found a symbol to rally themselves around. The only symbol sure to outshine the emblem of Germany's genocidal rampage over Europe... the "smiley awesome face".
A war began. Natzi flag holdouts, "Finfags", and the Smileys went head-first into battle. Time was not the only thing felled on this battlefeild, many chance artistic encounters between people occupying the same drawing circles were also casualties to blue, white, yellow, black and red skirmishes.
At the end of the day, the Smileys gained the upper digital hand controlling the paintbrush. But for how long? The battle continues to this minute. What new splinter faction will be the new masters of two.drawball.? And will you be there, "%9000" draw points at the ready, to fight and see who wins at the end of every few hours?
I really hope not, that might mean your a Finfag, and everyone knows the "awesome face" rules!.
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